How Console Gamers are made 

Who hasn’t gone out in search of the newest, most advanced game released, and after carefully reading the system requirements for their PC, purchased the game, brought it home and eagerly loaded it up only to have it lock-up on the title screen? Sound familiar?

After a few choice (and sometimes not so choice) words the buyer snatches up the box to make sure they haven’t misread some critical requirement only to find that their system is within the parameters listed. A small doubt creeps into his mind as he wonders if the new memory chips he plugged in himself had anything to do with it. Shaking it off the buyer decides to start the long and tedious task of getting the game to play.

First he looks at the ‘troubleshooting’ section of the game guide to make sure that some little in game toggle wasn’t overlooked. After reading some very enlightening advice such as: ‘make sure your monitor is on’. The gamer soon realizes that there is going to be no real solution forthcoming from this, so he moves onto the next step (that nagging doubt about the new chips resurfaces but he quickly shakes it off).

Logging on to the game manufacturers’ web site, he quickly finds the title of his game and prays that his system, graphics card or sound card does not end up with the ‘asterisk of doom’. That is, the symbol that designates that the game is ‘not supported by this manufacturer’. With a sigh of relief at passing this first hurtle, the gamer plunges onward. Looking at the sites trouble shooting section, the gamer diligently tries every remedy that fits his problem (which, of course, takes most of the day) but with no results. With a deep sigh he realizes that his options are quickly shrinking.

As a last gasp, he goes to the game’s forum and types a plea to anyone with his particular PC set-up asking if they might have experienced a similar problem. Low and behold, an hour later, someone answers his desperate cry with a simple suggestion as to how to fix the problem. Holding his breath he tries the video card and sound settings suggested and viola, it works!

Now able to play the game he soon finds out that the game chugs along likes a dyslectic reader and sounds like someone talking into a tin can. Realizing too late (sorry can’t return the game after it is opened) that ‘minimum requirements’ really meant minimum performance. If he wants to enjoy this game he is going to have to shell out an additional $130 for an upgrade for his graphics card and a near equal amount for a better sound card. Not only that, but with the new settings,  his other games now freeze up!

Logging back onto the games website he asks if there is anything else he might do to make things better and several people say: “Yeah, get an X-Box!”